NFL Divisional picks: Icebox Cake

Jim Vallet and Robert Perea, The Fernley Reporter

It has not been a good last couple of weeks for us. First our furnace went out, and we had to replace it. Then, after months of declining physical and mental health, we had to euthanize our dog of 18 years. After that our dryer, garage door, and car battery all breathed their last. Finally, my sister in Michigan was in a horrible automobile accident that has left her in terrible pain.

But I can tolerate the whammies of all these recent events because of icebox cake.

Icebox cake, also known as whipped cream cake, is the greatest cake in the history of the world. My mom first made it for me using the recipe passed from her mom when I was very young, and I loved it immediately. Who doesn’t love the combination of chocolate cookies smothered in whipped cream? It has been my cake request for every birthday and special occasion. When I separated from the Air Force and came home from 2 ½ years in Greece, that’s what my mom made for my coming home celebration. When I graduated from high school and college, I got icebox cake. Every birthday, I got icebox cake. When I got engaged to my wife, I got icebox cake. At that engagement celebration, my mom taught my wife to make my beloved cake and my wife has continued the savory tradition to this day.

But, making icebox cake has become quite a chore. It always was time consuming because the maker has to coat each cookie with whipped cream on all sides, then use the whipped cream to adhere one cookie to the next. When all the cookies are in place, it is then necessary to coat all the sides and top with whipped cream before letting it sit in the refrigerator (known to my Grandma as the “icebox”) for 24 hours. For me, who did little to nothing except eat, the hardest part was waiting 24 hours. I must admit to cheating when I was younger and I discovered that waiting 24 hours was a really good idea.

Besides the tedious process of making my favorite cake, the problem today is actually getting the cookies. The bittersweet chocolate wafers used to be made by Nabisco, but the company, much to my dismay, has discontinued production of the main ingredient in my special treat. 

This has not discouraged my indefatigable wife. When we lived in Overton, my wife would make the hour-and-a-half one way drive to Las Vegas to the only store in all of Southern Nevada that still carried Nabisco Bittersweet Chocolate Wafers. Since we have moved to Northern Nevada, the Smith’s in Lemmon Valley has been the only place in this area to procure my beloved cookies. But this year when my lifetime partner made her annual cookie pilgrimage, the store informed her that Nabisco had discontinued production completely.

This still did not detour my wife. She went online and ordered two different kinds of bittersweet chocolate wafers but when she got them, she realized they would not work due to taste and absorbing too much of the whipped cream. So, my spouse somehow got the Nabisco recipe for bittersweet chocolate wafers and made them herself. I will find out tomorrow, my birthday, how well the cookies work.

And so, icebox cake has once again brought joy to my life. First, it was because of the taste that I fell in love with as a kid. Then, it became a symbol of good things like birthdays, coming home parties, engagement parties and graduations. Now, although I still love it, it is a clear sign of my wife’s love and all the hoops she is willing to jump through to make me happy.

I read a lot on social media of people proclaiming their love for their significant other. I see all the tributes to people who have passed on, some of them from people who were not very nice to the “dearly departed” when he was alive. I see people spend outrageous amounts of money on their partners, while cheating on them at the same time. I see married people  hedging their bets, not ready to commit to their partners. I am not being critical of any of these people, but to me love is proven by actions. And my wife Melanie has proven her love to me by what she does to make me happy. Although I’m not happy about the setbacks I already described, I can live with them when I am loved. I’m a lucky guy.

Icebox cake has saved my sanity.

In the NFL, actions also speak louder than words. The Chargers need more than a different coach to compete for a championship. Just putting on the Steelers’ uniform does not guarantee success. If you didn’t pay attention to Green Bay’s performance against good NFL teams this year, you were disappointed last Sunday. If you believe the talk that a rookie can’t win a playoff game, much less a road playoff game, then you probably didn’t bet on Jayden Daniels and his Commanders Sunday night. And if you ignored all the close (lucky?) wins the Vikings had this year and Sean McVay’s record as a head coach, you probably thought the Vikings were a sure thing Monday night. All these teams and their players proved what they really were this past season last weekend.

So, how does all this matter this coming weekend? Who really has a better defense, the Chiefs or the Texans? Do you trust Patrick Mahomes or CJ Stroud? Before you believe the Lions have solved their defensive woes from three weeks ago, take a look at the Vikings’ offense against the Rams. Were your eyes deceiving you when you thought Jalen Hurts didn’t look right, or was it rust? And is the Bills’ run defense as bad as many think in spite of their performance against the Broncos’ speed-of-sloth running backs?

Trust what you believe you saw. Actions speak louder than words.

This week is the Divisional round of the NFL playoffs. Historically, this round has been a very good round for bettors who bet favorites. Last week, Wild Card Weekend, historically has been good for underdogs and that proved true last week with underdogs winning 3 of 6 games, although all the pregame point spreads that the ‘dogs won were 3 points or less. There were no big (more than 7 point) underdogs that won or even covered the point spread. I guess you can make those facts mean whatever you want. 

Here are my picks for this weekend’s games against the point spread. Lines are from espn.com on Tuesday, Jan. 14.

Kansas City Chiefs (-8) vs. Houston Texans: The Chiefs have the best QB in the NFL. I also think they have a better defense, play better on special teams, and have better coaching. And home field advantage. Lay the points.

Los Angeles Rams (+6 ½) at Philadelphia Eagles: I’m believing my eyes that Jalen Hurts was not right last Sunday, and that some Eagles (I’m looking at you, AJ Brown) are not happy in their present roles. This game will not be a slam dunk, but is Sean McVay the best coach in the NFL?

Baltimore Ravens (-1) at Buffalo Bills: The Ravens opened as 1 point underdogs, but apparently a lot of people are looking at this game like I am, and that is wondering how the Bills can possibly stop the Ravens’ running game. I don’t think they can, but I think Josh Allen will play great.

Washington Commanders (+10) at Detroit Lions: I will not be betting nor predicting this game. I’m thinking the Lions’ dominant defensive performance against the Vikings was more a result of bad offense than good defense. This line opened at Lions -5 ½ and has moved to Lions -10. If you like the Commanders, you are getting 4 ½ points more than the oddsmakers think you should, and I trust the oddsmakers more than the bettors. The Lions don’t care if they win by 1 point or 10 points, but I would be caring a lot if I bet it. Still, I can’t bet, or even predict, against my Lions. Saturday night I’ll be decked out in my Lions’ attire, cheering for the Honolulu blue and Silver as hard as anyone in a La-Z-Boy can cheer. Go Lions!

Last week 4-2

Season 54-60-2

Robert’s picks

Happy Birthday, Jim! Enjoy that Icebox cake, and I likewise won’t be betting the Commanders/Lions game, but I will join you in rooting for the Lions. I’m also hoping to break my streak of going 1-2 the last three weeks, and not with a zero in the first column.

Notre Dame (+8 ½) vs Ohio St.: This is not my strongest opinion of the season, but Notre Dame is 13-2 against the spread this season, 13-6-1 as an underdog since 2014 and covered the spread each of the past two seasons against Ohio St., both in very low-scoring games. The talent difference this year is narrower than it was the past two years, and Ohio St. has struggled the most against physical teams that can match up at the line of scrimmage. That’s where Notre Dame is best.

Eagles (-6) vs. Rams: Just for kicks, I asked Copilot, the AI assistant on Word, to write a pick on the Eagles, and this is what it churned out: Now, turning to another game, I recommend picking the Eagles to cover the spread. The Eagles have been strong contenders this season, showing consistent performance across both home and away games. Their defense has been particularly impressive, managing to contain several high-powered offenses. Additionally, their offense has been effective in exploiting weaknesses in their opponents’ defenses, making them a reliable choice for this match-up.

Then I asked for a pick on the Rams, and it said: Despite the Eagles’ impressive record, the Rams have shown a resilient spirit this season. With a solid defense that has managed to hold its own against top-tier teams, and an offense that has been gradually finding its rhythm, the Rams present a formidable challenge. Their ability to adapt and strategize in high-pressure situations makes them a strong contender to cover the spread in this game.

So instead of an irresistible force against an immovable object, we have a reliable choice against a strong contender. But what I see is a Philly defense that has been absolutely stifling, against a Rams offense that scored 19 points and only gained 242 yards against the Jets, and 12 points without a touchdown against the 49ers in their last two outdoor games. Now they face the league’s best defense with temperatures in the 30s and a forecast of 3-5 inches of snow. The Eagles should ride Saquan Barkley and their defense to a double-digit win.

Bills (+1) vs Ravens: I was disappointed to see there is no snow in the forecast Sunday in Buffalo, although the current forecast is for a temperature of 24 degrees at kickoff. Regardless, I’m going against the grain on this one. Buffalo’s defense is most vulnerable against high-powered passing attacks. The Ravens want to run like they did on Sept. 29 when they beat the Bills 35-10 with 199 yards rushing from Derrick Henry. Henry is capable of that at any time, but Buffalo improved steadily as the season went on. I think they’re still underrated, and I think they get it done at home.

Last week

College 0-0

NFL 1-2

Season

College 34-33

NFL 32-23-1